arghh!!!!!!!! fuck.. i'm goin more insane as the day goes.. haix.. suspect my mum hav depression.. have to super careful with wad i say cos depression ppl are like 100x more sensitive den average ppl..zzz.... means i've to be a guai boy.. haix.. wish i was like 18 or sth, den i wun be here bloggin, but will be at some pub drinkin away.. waitin to drink to death.. i nt so carefree or cheerful as i may seem.. i m a deeply troubled person.. i've loads of my own probs too... n some i cant share even with the closest person.. so i have to bottle everyting up n tell some to yang lo.. zzz... i noe i piss ppl off all de time.. sorry for tt, call tt de-stressin.. i noe its a lame excuse.. of course tt does nt giv me a license to go round being a real pain in the ass.. sry ppl, i promise i'll try.. haix.. i wish i could jux collapse altogether n all my troubles will leave me.. zzz... my mum is down my throat again.. but i cant get rude or anyting, or she'll get all emotional n i'll get it frm the rest of my family.. haix.. darn.. today was roughly like ytd, except i din go sushi with willie they all or wad, but i went bubble tea with ryan tho.. sian.. i wish i could stay out all day n only be home when everyone is asleep... its harder n harder each day.. i'm human too, i nid my own breathing space, the trouble i hav at home is more den enough, yet i hav other troubles like ppl spreading vicious rumours bout me, backstabbin n all tt shit.. u cant hav ur cake n eat it.. well, y nt? nt even an exception? nw the added trouble is tt i'm being ignored by some individuals(nt sayin hu)even staying at the playground at night alone listening to music is better den being at home.. i wish i could be financially independent n like can leave home anytime i want, its nt i'm nt fillial or wad, but its too... too tiring to stay home.. eu ppl wun understand.. feel SLIGHTLY n i mean ONLY SLIGHTLY better after letting all these out, but still nt exactly feeling fantastic cos dere are tings i can say here, nor to my family or even my closest frens.. zzz... well tts enough... bye peeps, thanks for lendin me ur eyes....


josh™